I want to talk for a minute about grudges. For a community of people who follow Jesus (who quite famously did not hold grudges) we sure are good at it, and it’s time we were called out on it.
Grudges are something we all carry as humans, often for seemingly good reasons. It is the old saying, “Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me,” taken to the next level. We hold such resentment that it clouds every interaction involving that person. We carry a persistent ill will that gnaws away at us. We might say, “I don’t even think about that person anymore!” yet we spend a vast amount of energy saying that to anyone who will listen.
Make no mistake: maintaining anger and grudges takes energy. They suck the joy from our lives and, most importantly, they separate us from the forgiving love of God. How often do we pray, “Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that trespass against us”?
But let me be clear: we are not forgiven because we have forgiven. God’s love and forgiveness are not a transactional service. We are asked to forgive because that is what Jesus does, and we are called to do likewise.
I was recently reading the story of the raising of Lazarus and was struck by Jesus’ command to “unbind him.” Isn’t that exactly what Jesus asks for all of us: to be unbound? To let go rather than hold on; to put down rather than carry. Holding on and carrying rob us of the energy we could put toward a far better use.
We are, after all, being watched by the next generation. I may not be over the hill yet, but I have definitely crested it, and I see younger generations coming to the Church seeking something that’s missing in their lives. They hear the Gospels and Jesus’ teachings, sometimes for the first time in their lives, and they will decide whether our community, is following those instructions or not. We are told in Matthew’s Gospel (5:23-24): “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.”
Our identity as Christians cannot encourage grudges, but by grace and love. We are called to be living examples of the Gospel, so put down the weight, be light, and be free of it. Lazarus was unbound so that he could truly live. What grudges are your grave clothes? Unbind, forgive, and follow Christ.
